Bringing the Word to Life

The Sixth Mansion (Part 1): Passionate Love for God

1 Comment / Lent, Lung Cancer, Personal, Spiritual Progress through the Interior Castle / By /

My husband and I were married two weeks after college graduation and almost four years after meeting. Our courtship had weathered difficulties and challenges, revealing our true characters to each other. Over the years, our love grew through square-dance flirting to solid commitment to passion (yes, in that order, although my husband might have a different view . . .). The process of falling in love involved a deeper knowledge of my beloved, an appreciation of his fine qualities, a willingness to submit my life to his care, and a mysterious chemistry that simply bound us together in intimate communion. […]

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The Fifth Mansion: Longing for Oneness with God

4 Comments / Lent, Parnell v. San Francisco, Personal, Romans 8, Spiritual Disciplines, Spiritual Progress through the Interior Castle, Theological Reflection / By /

Have you ever wondered what Jesus was really praying for in the High Priestly Prayer when he asked his heavenly Father to make us one with Jesus as Jesus is one with the Father? (John 17:22-23). The idea of oneness conjures up different images. I have come into contact with a distinctly Eastern religious view of “oneness with the Universe.” As I understand the concept, the goal of life and the event at death is a complete absorption of one’s personhood and personality into The One Cosmic Being. Only that Universe remains in existence, all other beings having become a

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The Fourth Mansion: Discovering the Love of Jesus

1 Comment / Lent, Lung Cancer, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines, Spiritual Progress through the Interior Castle / By /

One of the spiritual accomplishments of this year’s bout with lung cancer has been an exit from the rat race. Actually, that transition has been long in coming, since I left the full-time pastorate at the very end of 2006. Various projects kept me busy and over-stimulated for another five years, but I have been working at home alone in a virtually self-directed manner since then. Last Fall this illness hit and its treatment modulated my pace down to a slow-motion ride through Disneyland’s Space Mountain. This prolonged experience seems to coincide with further spiritual development identified by Teresa of

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The Third Mansion: Following Jesus

1 Comment / Leadership and Spirituality, Lent, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines, Spiritual Progress through the Interior Castle, The Pastoral Call / By /

We continue our study of the stages of spiritual growth, as first pondered by sixteenth century Christian mystic Teresa of Avila (The Interior Castle) and more recently unpacked by Thomas Ashbrook (Mansions of the Heart). So far, we have appreciated the fresh new life that comes with conversion and the inner struggle this life introduces as we feel the tension of forsaking the old life. In the Christian life, moving successfully through the tug-of-war stage of the Second Mansion means the question of whether I will fully commit myself to this life with this Savior is settled. Or mostly. The

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The Second Mansion: Torn between Two Loyalties

2 Comments / Lent, Personal, Spiritual Progress through the Interior Castle / By /

Our exploration of the seven stages of spiritual growth, according to Teresa of Avila and unpacked by Thomas Ashbrook in Mansions of the Heart, continues. Especially during Lent, it is appropriate to take stock of how we are doing spiritually, to see if we are any closer to the love of God. It’s always been a rather vexing enterprise to find ways to measure spiritual development, because assessments are so often performance-based. But Teresa ushers us through the seven “mansions” of her “interior castle” to illustrate the movement from the active (performance-based) to the infused (relationship-based) phases of life with

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The First Mansion: New Life in Christ

Leave a Comment / Lent, Lung Cancer, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines / By /

In this seven-part Lenten series, my intent is to reflect upon the insights of Thomas Ashbrook in Mansions of the Heart, his own exploration of Teresa of Avila’s The Interior Castle. Ashbrook sees Teresa’s “seven phases of spiritual transformation as an ancient yet timeless roadmap to help us understand our journey” (13). The governing image is of a castle comprising seven “mansions.” The first mansion starts at the front door, and each successive area gets closer and closer to the very center of the castle. Passage from one mansion to the next illustrates growth into a new level of spiritual

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Unbind Her and Let Her Go!

4 Comments / Lent, Lung Cancer, PCUSA, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines, The Missional Church / By /

The evening after my lung surgery I was tethered to my bed. No, I wasn’t handcuffed to the bedframe, but I might as well have been. There were nine different ties holding me down: automatic leg compressors wrapped around my calves, a surgical drain from my side, a catheter, a blood-pressure cuff, five leads adhered to my torso for the EKG and respiration counter, an IV in each hand, another PICC line, and an oxygen thingy stuck in my nose. These various input and output devices gave medical staff signals as to my wellbeing and access for treatment. Through them

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Cotton Mouth

1 Comment / Lent, Lung Cancer, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines, Uncategorized / By /

One more thought on the pain management topic, and then I’ll move on. Morphine is a very fine medicine and effective pain killer. It doesn’t reach everything, like the persistent back spasm gripping my left shoulder blade, but it manages everything else quite well thank you. Nevertheless, morphine has side effects. The one I want to talk about is dry mouth. When I woke from the anesthesia and my daughters came to see me in ICU, my mouth was completely dry, to the point of sticking to itself. Talking through a wad of cotton mouth was impossible, eliciting polite giggles

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Come in Weakness

3 Comments / Leadership and Spirituality, Lung Cancer, Personal, The Pastoral Call / By /

One last blog on the subject of fatigue: The present circumstances have caused me to experience fatigue in a much different way than I have the past sixty years. In decades past, tiredness of the usual kind was remedied by sleep, because the cause was hard work, long days, or stress. When a pastor, for instance, is denied sleep because of ministry’s demands, a sleep deficit is created. The only way to pay it back is to get the sleep one lost. [On this subject, I highly recommend William C. Dement’s book The Promise of Sleep, in which he identifies

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Come to the Waters

3 Comments / Lung Cancer, Personal, Spiritual Disciplines / By /

Continuing my thoughts on the subject of fatigue, my memory goes back to the early days of motherhood, before the babies were sleeping the night. How many months can a person go without uninterrupted sleep? With Darling Daughter #1, God had mercy on me in six weeks, after which we could get seven or eight hours straight. But Darling Daughter A (born weighing 9 pounds, 6 ounces, by the way) was still waking up in the middle of the night at five months. I remember being so completely exhausted in September 1983 that I cancelled my involvement in every single

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